I went to Disney World. Ignore Twitter: The Kingdom is still magic.

At some point during my family’s visit to Disney World, I started to wonder where I was supposed to find all the degeneracy the House of Mouse is accused of peddling. “It’s A Small World” remains a compilation of national stereotypes. The men’s and women’s rooms are still clearly marked. And Americana remains alive and well at Tom Sawyer Island, which is located across the way from the Hall of Presidents and encircled by a moat patrolled by the Liberty Belle paddleboat.

The trip wasn’t simply a reprieve from Twitter...