Lights, Camera, Action (zzzz), Tweet!

I have spent the past few days sequestered with a crack team of political pros — actually, curled into a fetal ball, clutching a fading 1980 John Anderson poster — to gird myself for the vital first debate between President Obama and Mitt Romney.

So many questions lingered:

Would Romney offer to wager Obama $10,000 on who wins the race?

Would Obama tell Romney, "You're taxable enough, Mitt"?

Would the two men reveal the secret handshake taught only to graduates of both Harvard College and Harvard Law School? (Didn't remember...