No, the Equal Rights Amendment is not a 'feminist handout'

On the day Virginia officially voted to ratify the Equal Rights Amendment earlier this month, becoming the crucial 38th state to do so, I listened to a male colleague explain his opposition to what he deemed "feminist" messaging—specifically, a political campaign touting the fact that a woman was first to accomplish something in her field. A "feminist" angle, he argued, was anything but persuasive to a general audience.

"It's a turnoff," he said. "Just another woman looking for a handout."

A familiar flurry of rage spun in my chest. Why is it "feminist" to celebrate an accomplishment, and why is praising a woman so off-putting? Yet it was good for me to hear his argument—because he is not alone.

In response to an op-ed I wrote arguing that tampons are necessary and therefore should be tax-exempt, like other necessities, one commenter wrote, "Life sucks for everyone. I'm so sick of it being just about women. Get over it."