Federal Agents Drive 3 Hours Away From Portland Before Realizing Abducted Protester Still In Backseat

Posted on AllSides July 31st, 2020
From The Left
HUMOR

Cursing their inattention and debating whether they should turn around, several U.S. federal agents reportedly had driven three hours away from Portland Friday before realizing an abducted protester was still in the backseat. “Goddamnit, how did we miss him?” said federal agent Steve LaJoie to his partner after hearing muffled cries from a handcuffed man and registering that he must have been unconscious in the backseat of their unmarked vehicle for nearly 200 miles since the operatives had pulled out of Portland. “Shit, we hightailed it out of there so...

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The Onion (Humor)

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