Press Horrified As Trump Begins Taking Shirt Off To Prove He's Not Obese

Horrified members of the press fled the White House lawn today as President Trump began taking off his shirt to prove that he's not obese as Nancy Pelosi claimed.

"Pathetic Nancy Pelosi has mental problems! I am the absolute picture of health!" Trump said solemnly as he started unbuttoning his dress shirt. "Look at this glorious body. Just look at it! Not doctored at all. Just pure Trump!"

"No, Mr. President! We believe you!" shouted journalists as they scrambled to get out of there. "Run away! Keep running!"

But the...