A Close Read of Joaquin Phoenix and Renée Zellweger’s Utterly Baffling Oscar Speeches

There comes a time in an actor’s life when they find themselves seated in the Dolby Theater for the 12th consecutive hour, and they are either working on their face of gracious defeat for when their name is not called out as a winner, or they are optimistically going over a victory speech in their head, ensuring they don’t forget this producer or that agent or that grip on stage. (Or they are running around the bar, asking why the Academy can’t “just do another ‘Shallow,’” which is probably the...